From Dane Cook to George Orwell to me

That's right, I'm going to talk about Dane Cook and George Orwell (really Eric Arthur Blaire) in the same passage. And I'm going to talk about myself as well.

Dane Cook has a skit about the Kool-aid Man. He's talking about having to fix the wall before his Dad get's home because the Kool-aid Man came bursting through it. "Yeah, coming through the wall is real *&$#!@ cool! Coming through the front door is cool!" It's a good point.

Now for my point. STOP USING FOREIGN WORDS IN ENGLISH ESSAYS PEOPLE! It is not cool. It is ostentatious. I've been going through a lot of books because I am a research minion for one of my professors. Today, I encountered Ayn Rand saying something stupid and unnecessary.
"Man is born with an emotional mechanism, just as he is born with a cognitive mechanism; but, at birth, both are 'tabula rasa.'"
-Pg. 26 The Virtue of Selfishness
Ayn, darling, the emotional mechanism and cognitive mechanism are not "tabula rasa." (Now, I'll admit I had to look this phrase up.) First, "tabula rasa" is a singular noun. Plural would be rasae. Second, the word means clean slate, or having no preconceived essence or form, and doesn't really make sense because it's not an adjective. Third, not being an adjective, it needs an article when used in an English essay, WHICH IS WHY YOU SHOULDN'T USE IT IN THE FIRST PLACE. Fourth, just don't.

It's even worse when people use phrases like that and then define them in the text. How stupid. Orwell thought the English language should be purged of using terms like this. They should only be used when absolutely necessary to capture the intended meaning. Orwell is rolling over in his grave somewhere.

Finally, me. What about me? Well, the very fact that I would write this "blog" entry, dropping names like Ayn Rand and George Orwell, falls under the same principle. It's ostentatious. Is anyone going to be intellectually or otherwise benefitted by reading my rant about the usage of latin phrases in English exposition? No. How many people write "blogs" for the same masturbatory reasons? STOP IT PEOPLE. If it doens't benefit others or provoke honest thought, then write in your diary. (Now that doesn't mean using these blog things to tell others about your life or keep them updated about you. That's part of the whole purpose. I'm just referring to stupid displays of one's own wit or intelligence.) Shalom.

Nordles

St. Schnatty's Day, $@#! Yeah!

The 17th is St. Patty's Day? F*** yeah! Let's get wasted! It's on Saturday too! F***in awesome! Let's get more wasted!

Are you Irish?

What the s*** does that matter? The beer's green? F*** yeah, let's drink more of it!
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July Fourth? S*** yeah! Let's get f***in schnokered! Sam Adams drank beer. Hell he MAKES beer. F***in awesome! Let's get wasted!

Do you know what year claimed independence?

What the &*%$#*$#@#$#* does that matter? They put American flags in the beer? Let's drink the beers AND THE FLAGS!
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Easter? F*** yeah! Let's get wasted! Jesus drank wine. F*** yeah! It's on Sunday? F***in awesome! Let's get more wasted!

Do you know that the Easter bunny is not in the Bible?

What the f*** does that matter? They put Easter Eggs in the beer! Jesus hunted Easter eggs AND he drank wine. I'm toasting to Jesus!
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MLK Day? F*** yeah! Let's get hammered! The beers black? I love black people, let's drink even more beer!

Have you ever read "Letters from Birmingham Jail?"

Why would I read someone else's letters? Forget reading, let's drink some beeeeeeeerrrr! Here's to MLK!
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Labor Day? F*** yeah! Let's get ferschniken! The beer's made by LABORERS! I work too! Let's drink more beer so we can create more job opportunities!

I'm out of questions.

F*** yeah! Labor beer!
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Veterans' Day? F*** yeah! I'm gettin' hammered! My grandfather is a veteran! Here's to Grandpa!

Didn't your grandfather have to stop drinking because he had some liver problems?

Yeah! This one's for Grandpa!
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America doesn't celebrate holidays. America celebrates beer on holidays.

what may we say

In Albert Camus' The Fall, Clamence says, "A single sentence will suffice for modern man: he fornicated and read the papers."

That book debuted debuted in 1956. This morning I was listening to Gideon Tsang talk about he found it challenging and enjoyable to work through the nature of his relationship to God and his place in the world, as long as it was on his own time. The hard part, he said, was when it involved actually being with other people. Because other people are annoying. We all laughed, but sadly, the aphorism is true.

Hemingway said that other people are the limiters of one's happiness. And the more I think about this, the truer it becomes, and the more I realize how selfish I am. We are so driven, so ambitious, so efficient. I know I do it - I put my academic goals and studies above other people. And I'm becoming painfully aware of the consequences. Where am I going to turn when I need understanding and friendship. I can communicate myself on paper, and paper and words can talk back. But paper can't listen any more than a wall can. Thankfully I do have a few good friends here. But we can't keep friends and community if we don't give of ourselves. In short, what may I say about modern man in 2007?

A single sentence will suffice for modern man: He has no sentence that will suffice because he is too busy to know his neighbors well enough to say.

On the bright side, this a spring of good music. Modest Mouse, The Arcade Fire, my new study favorite Explosions in the Sky (Thanks Scott), and the new Kings of Leon next month.

I know it's been a while. Sorry, I've had a dry spell.

Nords

a conversation

A conversation between Brad Kinkeade and myself:

Brad: "So let me get this straight. The clubbing of baby seals and the raising of oil prices is funding your seminary education."
Me.: "Well, now that you put it that way...Yes. Yes, that is exactly right."

Bloc Party: terrible name. fantastic new album.

not feeling wordy
Nords

Here we go again

I struggled for a little while with my motivations for keeping up this whole "blog" thing. I almost cancelled thing, thinking that possibly I was simply writing for attention. But I decided against it, since I like to think of this as more of a writing exercise to keep for writing tools sharp. I love people commenting and starting a little dialogue, but I will continue to write even if no one reads it.
Now on to today's agenda.
First of all, for those of you who don't know, Pat Todd sucks. What kind of person casts aspersions via internet comments?
Yes Pat, the irony was intended.

Second, I have a love affair with the deep South. I do not claim to be a Southerner. I'm a Texan, and there is a difference. But I love the South all the same, though I'm not sure why. Faulkner, Percy, Welty, Hurston, Flannery O'Connor, Toole, Joel Chandler Harris...you name it. I love them. I love Skynard and the Ozark Mountain Daredevils. I remember how disheartened I was when I found out that CCR came out of California. They don't have bayous in Cali. All this brings us to my new music love, the Cold War Kids (whom I will refer to as CWK).

Very few musical acts can pull off narrative music. It is a difficult thing to tell a story accompanied by music that captures the tone and syntax. Ryan Adams and Patty Griffin get it sometimes. I appreciate the Decembrists, but I've never really been able to get into them. CWK come out of California like CCR. And they spin tales predominately set in the South. And they do it well. And I don't care that they are from California. In fact, if they were from the South I dont' think they would be able to create their frenetic, spastic, spontaneously precise sound. I don't usually fall in love with bands that are so rangy and unmelodic, but I love the CWK's "Robbers and Cowards." You get a very percussive, driven beat laced with jazz, ragtime, gospel, folky blues, and just plain raucous distortion.

There are very few albums I've found that seem to take you to a place and put you there just be listening to it. The songs, in a concise few minutes each, build characters. It's literary music. Listen to it. Love it.
I hope this Friday afternoon finds all of you well.

Jordan

Good things

I've been thinking lately about the good and bad things in life. The good things: a good cup or pint, the people in your life who are "as good as the spring itself," the smell of leather, the sound of rain on the roof, the clarity that comes after a day of hard work. The list goes on.
The bad things: conflicting interests, humidity, futility, reality TV, most music played on the radio, dependency (on unwholesome things.) The list goes on.

But the best thing in life is purpose - knowing where you stand, what you stand for, what you stand on, what you understand, and what you stand under. But I know anyone who knows all of these things. Even if you do have a conrete idea, it is more of a concrete block, which you spend the rest of your life chipping and cracking to define it more clearly. And if you're like me you have the curse of finding this process very fascinating. And I want nothing more than to have this concrete block reach its final form, but I also don't want that because then what else would I do with my life?

I love what I do every day, that is with the exception of working at Cheddar's. I love sifting through all the literature of God and man and religion and morality. And all these things are ultimately important and applicable and yet much of it is very specific and true or not, relatively insignificant. What would I do with all the answers? Would I help other people understand things that helped them to live better, fuller, lives? Would I feel like I knew more than everyone else? It's all very important and very amusing. People are funny. Life is funny. There my aphorism of life.

a little of the funny to assuage your day

That link is absolute gold. Thank you Dave Eggers, for McSweeney's, among many other things.

How many political idealists does it take to change a lightbulb?
None.
Political idealists can't change anything.

How do you feel about that? Gimme some dialogue people!

Have a nice Tuesday, come see me at Cheddar's
astronords